New Arrival

Tyberius Robert Honu

I'm so pleased to share this post with you all. I meant to share it much sooner but honestly it has been like a mad house around here with our new addition and we are all still getting used to our new lives with our new addition! Ty is actually one month old and I can't even believe that it has gone that fast! However when you are in the trenches and so deeply in love it is no wonder that time flies away from you.

Ty arrived on July 7th via a scheduled induction and after 12 hours of INTENSE labor he arrived into the world and changed our lives for the better. I want to do a proper post on my labor and delivery and hopefully I will get to that in the next week.

A lot of people have asked where I got the name. Well the truth is I didn't name him at all! After Kyra was born I had told my husband that he could name the next baby we had since he basically had no say in Kyra's name I just told him what it was. So he had Ty's name picked out for a good long while and told absolutely NO ONE his name until he was born. I mean even I didn't know what my baby's name was going to be until he was handed to me. Now that being said I had seen a  list of possible names and had given my opinions on them before hand but I had no idea which name would be the winner. I'm very happy with his name and actually we have gotten a lot of compliments on it being a unique name. Sure it's different but honestly once you hold this little guy and look into his face you just know...that was always meant to be his name.

I'm so happy to introduce my baby boy to you all and those of you that have been around for a while know how much this pregnancy and this baby meant to me since Ty is my rainbow baby. Sometimes I can't even believe that we made it and that my baby is in my arms and everything I wished for came true. My heart is just so full.

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What's New-Life Catch up and stuff

We hit 25 weeks this week with baby. If you didn't see our gender announcement on other forms of social media we are having a boy! 

Baby is doing well in face the doctor said she is very happy and everything is going perfectly. I cannot tell you how awesome that was to hear.

I haven't gained any 'weight' this pregnancy so far. I actually am down about 15 pounds because I was having some serious food aversions throughout the first trimester and since then I have just been trying to eat as healthy as I can whenever I can. I'm having a hard time eating for the most part and find myself getting super full really quickly. I'm totally not complaining since I gained like 40 pounds with Kyra and if I come out of this pregnancy actually smaller than I went in? BONUS. Baby boy is gaining weight just fine though so no worries there.

My pup Arya knocked over my old computer the other day and now it has finally bitten the dust. That was a huge bummer but at least it let me save all my files and everything to a hard drive before it finally powered down for good.

Since I'm working from home I decided to take my taxes to get done by a professional this year. I'm glad that she is taking over honestly because I have never had to deal with self employment tax and all the things that go along with that. It's just worth it to me to have the piece of mind that the taxes will be done correctly and I don't have to spend a day doing it and learning how to do it properly. #worthit

I've become obsessed with cleaning videos on YouTube. Like watching people clean their house. I'm sure it has to do with nesting but honestly it has also made me want to clean my house more and more so that has to be a good thing right? However it has also made me want to try new cleaning products. I see a lot of these women use Mrs. Meyers or they go through Grove Collaborative. Now this may just be because they are sponsored by these products but I'm honestly curious, have any of you used these products or this site? Is it worth the hype? This mama needs to know because I honestly just want to clean this house from top to bottom while I still have the energy to do so!

Speaking of energy it comes and goes. Monday I was fully of energy for the most part because I had a doctor's appointment and had things going on all morning, then I had a small nap, and then a birthday celebration with my in laws. Tuesday I felt like a truck hit me. So tired and so worn out that I didn't even get out of bed until 9 am despite being awake for about 2 hours by then. I was just there listening to Kyra breathe and feeling baby boy moving around and trying to stay as still as possible because if the dogs know I'm awake then they will promptly be all over me. Anyhow I did eventually get up but the whole day I felt like I should have just been in bed instead. SO TIRED. And then Wednesday I was full of energy all morning and got so much done but by 1pm I was napping on the couch with Kyra. It's just so up and down. 


And lastly I'm finally one of those to join the essential oil club. I bought a 3 pack at Ross with the intention of making some wool dryer balls and infusing them with scents to replace using dryer sheets. I haven't gotten my wool done yet but I did infuse some baking soda with the lavender and sprinkled it all over the mattress while I was washing the sheets and comforter. It made my bed smell like HEAVEN. Seriously game changer. Now I need a diffuser because honestly if it made my bed smell that good then I need my whole house to smell that way. Sold. 

Be sure to join the linkup and share what's new with you! 

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Too scared to breathe: Pregnancy After Loss

Two pink lines. I immediately broke down crying. I'm pregnant and I'm terrified.

I spent the first trimester of this pregnancy not breathing properly. I felt like I couldn't take a full breathe or sigh or even think about what was going on inside me for fear that I would somehow jinx it. This was such a change from my first pregnancy and even my second...the one that I lost. When I first found out with those pregnancies I was just ready to jump for joy and share the news with anyone I saw. However the loss of my second pregnancy changed this for me. Drastically.

Please don't misunderstand me...I'm so very thrilled for this pregnancy and this baby. I hate that I spent the first trimester in a constant state of fear instead of appreciating what a miracle it was but I was so scared. I was so scared to tell anyone because I didn't want to get anyone's hopes up. I didn't want to get my own hopes up. There were weeks when I didn't even acknowledge the pregnancy to myself until I was getting sick. I spent a lot of the first trimester sick as a dog which isn't uncommon but I have to wonder if I was making things worse by being stressed and scared. I was also grateful every time I got sick. Seriously. Every time I threw up I was grateful because that meant there was still a baby in there.

I really like my doctor. She totally gets my fears and she was so patient with me. She made sure to do the blood tests to ease my fears. Her nurses always were kind and patient as I explained my newest pain or worry and made me feel at ease and totally normal. I cannot thank them enough for being so amazing while I was freaking out. If you are dealing with this...call your nurses, call your doctor, they are there to help you and if you have good ones you will feel immediate relief after just a phone call. That kind of piece of mind means the difference between sleep and no sleep for me.

The first trimester I told my parents and my husband only. If you are pregnant it is completely up to you when you tell people. Do what makes you feel comfortable as no one can predict what that level of comfort will be except for you. This time around I just didn't want to share. I wanted to keep this to myself and just wait until I knew for sure. I'm glad I did because when I finally got to share my news when I hit the second trimester I finally felt the tightness in my chest release. That feeling was so liberating.

My big moment the moment when I finally let myself believe and grieve and hope and feel all of the feelings was when we went in to hear the heartbeat. My doctor did all the normal checks and finally it was time to hear our little one's heartbeat. Kyra and Robert were there with me and then finally I heard that oh so sweet sound of our baby. I will tell you right now I cried. I was so happy and so very relieved. I will tell you I was also thrilled when my doctor said she wanted to schedule an ultrasound for the next day because twins run in my family and she couldn't rule out that there weren't multiples in there because my pelvic muscles are so strong (Sorry if that is TMI). My husband paled a little bit at the thought of twins but he was like "Well if there are two then we take home two."

Well at the ultrasound we confirmed that there was only one in there and they were growing and right on schedule from my estimated time frame. We got to see baby moving all around in there and again I cried tears of joy to know that this pregnancy is going along just as it is supposed to. I could finally breathe again.

Now we are 18 weeks and healthy and happy. Hopefully at the next appointment we will find out if we are having a boy or a girl. I'll be happy with either but I'm too impatient to wait to find out!


If you are going through a pregnancy after loss please know you aren't alone. You have every right to be scared, nervous, or even unwilling to admit that you are actually pregnant. These feelings are valid and totally normal. However if you are like me and you are just scared every moment please contact your doctors and nurses and tell them your feelings if they are good at their jobs they will ease your fears and help you in any way that they can. Hang in there mama, you got this.

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What's New With You- 2018 First Edtion

Well hello there.

So it's been literally months since I have been back to this space. Part of that was due to my computer refusing to load up blogger or basically anything but work related items and even that was hit and miss. However lucky girl that I am my husband got me a new computer so that I can get back into blogging and basically not swear at my computer every time I work!

So now that I can finally get back to blogging and back to commenting and following blogs again I thought I would join the linkup and get caught up and catch you all up on what has been going on around here.


Our biggest news - We are expecting our rainbow baby this June! We are so happy and excited.

I'm currently 17 weeks along and things have been going pretty well aside from the normal pregnancy symptoms. Nausea has been pretty intense but it is starting to ease up now that I'm in the second trimester and I'm finally starting to feel the baby move which is amazing.

I do plan on doing an entire blog post on the first trimester because it was pretty intense due to stress and fears from my previous loss. It's been rough I'll tell you that much.


Secondly its the new year! 2018 is going to be a big one for us personally and while I'm not a big resolution maker I am hoping to make some changes this year in both my personal and professional life. I really enjoy working from home but I'm hoping to start incorporating more creative pursuits into that part of my life.

I do plan on getting back into blogging at least twice a week because I have really missed this space. I'm not sure what all those post will entail but for now I'm just shooting for updates and life stuff because I'm still not sure just what it is I feel like sharing yet.

Fitness goals are pretty much just sticking to being as healthy as possible while pregnant. I'm trying to workout when I can and eat as much "real" food as possible for the baby. It's a process and I'm not 100 percent amazing at it but I'm trying my best.

I think that is pretty much it for the update for now as this post kind of got away from me and honestly I'm really rusty when it comes to writing here. Hopefully I'll get in the swing of things again.

Happy New Year to you and yours!

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