What I Read: January Edtion

It's time for the absolute best linkup ever. 

I have been looking forward to this one for a while now since I missed the last one. Although I didn't get a lot of reading done this past month to be honest. It's been hard to read since I can't seem to stay settled for very long, but I am working on it. I really am. However the two books I did read I enjoyed and I wanted to share them with you all today. 


So here we go: 

You by Caroline Kepnes
This book was SO CREEPY. I mean it was just seriously disturbing and yet I could not put it down! I finished it in less than 24 hours because I was hooked. I had to know what was going to happen next even though I was thoroughly disturbed. Honestly I cannot wait to pick up the sequel because it was just that good. I mean I really loved it even when it was terrifying and at times grossing me out. If you are into books that will make you want to look over your shoulder and wonder just what sort of people there really are in this world...well this one is for you.

Snow Flower and the Secret Fan by Lisa See
I picked this one for the Book Challenge that Erin is hosting and I have to say I was not disappointed. I have read Lisa See before and liked her and this book was no exception. I have a fascination with all Chinese traditions. Foot binding, hierarchy, the expectations of the women and men and how the households and marriages were arranged.....it all fascinates me. This book touches not only on those topics but also focuses on the bond between the women that lived through these things. I loved seeing the different bonds the women developed...the good and the bad.  The story was both wonderful and at the same time heartbreaking....but that is the way that life is. A great read. 

Short and sweet this past month but hopefully this month I will be able to get more reading done! 

Until then be sure to check out the linkup and see what everyone's been reading!

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I miss blogging.

I've been writing but not blogging.

My way of dealing with things but I miss blogging. I miss coming to this space.

However I'm not sure what to write about yet.

It seems strange to just dive back into normal blog posts.

I've changed a lot in the past three weeks. Yes...three weeks to the day. I wonder when I will stop counting the days....

Anyhow I want to come back to blogging. I want to come back to the space where I felt happy and ready to write. I miss linkups and comments and reading other blogs.

So this is my first small step into getting back into things again. I'm not saying things are going to be the same around here, in fact I can promise you that they won't. I'm going to be taking on some new topics and the basic thing is...I'm not the same anymore. For better or worse I'm changed.

Anyhow I'm going to keep this one short, just know I'm back to reading blogs and writing blogs again...and I'm glad.

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Coping

I wasn't sure when I would want to blog again.

However blogging has been on my mind a lot this past week.

Actually pretty much anything that I could find as a distraction has been on my mind.

I have to find things to do in order to keep from dwelling on what happened.

I get that some might find this odd or whatever but honestly I have to keep busy or else I run the risk of falling into a pit of misery and I'm terrified of how deep that pit is....and I don't know if there is a ladder out of it.

So I'm trying to stay busy.

I'm writing, coloring, baking, knitting, online shopping, watching movies, surfing Instagram, surfing Pinterest...basically anything anything at all.

That's how I'm coping.

I can't say if it is the right way or the healthy way, but it is is MY way of dealing.

I'm still crying. I'm still mourning. I'm still so incredibly suffocatingly sad.

I'm drowning in sadness....but I have to keep going.

Kyra needs me. Robert needs me. The world is still turning and even though this happened I have to still be apart of it.

So Thank You so very much to everyone that sent well wishes and good thoughts. I really do appreciate it.

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Hollow

I didn't know if I was going to write this post.

I wasn't even sure if I could.

However as usual writing is the only thing I can do when I can't express things out loud. Also I will probably be away from the blog for a while....I'm not sure how long....and I wanted you all to know why it is that I'm not around.

On Monday night....I lost the baby.

Everything was fine...and then it wasn't. It isn't.

I feel hollowed out inside. That is the only description that really describes it.

Emotionally I feel....numb. I have a lot of questions that I know will never be answered. I have a lot of pain that I know will never properly heal.

I'm not really ready to talk about everything yet. I'm sure that will be something that I will eventually have to write out in the future but right now....right now I can't.

Everything was fine...and then it wasn't.

And I will never know why.

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Some Monday Motivations

Good Morning Everyone, 

Normally I would be posting my weekend recap today but my weekend consisted of binge watching Big Bang Theory followed by an epic Lord of the Rings Marathon. It was only 9 degrees yesterday so we weren't leaving the house. Needless to say there isn't much to talk about! 

So instead I thought I would share some motivational quotes for this Monday Morning especially since I'm feeling them now that I have finally shaken my cold and am ready to get caught up on all the things that fell behind while I was sick!

Let's get Motivated. 

Have a great Monday Everyone!

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Friday Favorites 1/8

Good Morning Everyone, 

So this post is going up super late and I didn't get a post up yesterday because I have literally been EXHAUSTED. I'm not even joking. Not like "super tired" or even "super lazy" just EXHAUSTED. I literally feel like I can barely get anything done without having to sit down or rest. I also just randomly fell asleep on the couch yesterday. Like one minute I was awake and watching Kyra play and the next I was waking up without any idea of how much time had passed. Kyra was still happily playing so I'm guessing it wasn't that long but man it freaked me out. 

Apparently however this is totally normal. When I was pregnant with Kyra I remember being tired but never to this extent. I'm hoping it will pass soon. 

Anyhow now that you are updated let's get on with the Friday Favorites! 


Beauty: 

Nerdy Girl: 

 

Funnies: 

 

That's it for me this week, hopefully next week I will get it together and not be so exhausted! Have a great weekend everyone!

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Confessions- First of 2016

I confess that I haven't really gotten much done in the New Year since I've had a sick kiddo and then got sick myself. I feel pretty awful about it honestly...though I don't know why. 

I confess that while I didn't make any resolutions myself I have really enjoyed reading other people's. It's inspiring and I'm sitting here cheering you all on! 

I confess that I've been spending a lot of time trying to decide what it is that I want this blog to be this year. I want to have a little bit of focus but I have no idea what to focus on. Anything in particular you all like here on the blog? I'm open to all suggestions. 

I confess that while I'm not a planner girl I am a lover of bullet journals. I have my own in just a normal journal but I am hoping to take the plunge and get either a Leuchtturm 1917 or a Moleskine very soon....if I ever get out of the house again. 

I confess that it took me about four hours to do these five confessions because I kept either getting sick or nodding off so I'm just gonna call it quits. 

Happy Humpday Everyone.

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