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Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Observations



Here is a little run down of observations that I have come across this week:
 
1.       Apparently Kate Middleton and I are both 12 weeks along in our pregnancies. Only she is currently in the hospital with severe morning sickness….I am just sitting at work and running to the bathroom every couple minutes to dry heave or enjoy that lovely yellow bile that I am now familiar with. I am not a duchess so like other people I have to just work through this ick. 
 
2.       Elf on the Shelf has taken over Pinterest and I hate him. The thing is creepy and will probably kill someone in their sleep. The moment I see him I leave Pinterest…which has helped curb my addiction nicely. 
 
3.       I miss food. Seriously I actually miss the days when I loved food, now the thought or sight of food makes me want to get violently sick. There is no limit to what I am adverse to; I have to choke down food just so the doctor doesn’t yell at me…oh yeah and I don’t die or something. 
 
4.       Hormones are just evil. I am up, I am down, and I am just plain mean sometimes. I really hate how horrid I can act when I let them get the best of me. I try to apologize a lot and am grateful that everyone gives me a bit of room since I am pregnant. 
 
5.       For some reason the baby websites always tell you what size the baby is by referring to fruit. I fear that I sound like an idiot when I say, “The baby is the size of a plum this week!” I mean…how many people eat plums all that often? 
 
6.       I am eager for a bump because right now I think I just look fat. I feel like I must explain to people as they see me “I’m pregnant! I promise that I am not just gaining weight and being lazy! I am in fact walking and trying to be as healthy as possible!” I realize no one but me cares but…well I CARE. Also the scale has not moved at all, my pants just don’t fit anymore because really there is growth going on there…but I just feel fat. 
 
7.       I have no clothes. I threw out all my fat clothes so that I wouldn’t be tempted to grow back into them. Now everything is uncomfortable and I have one pair of slacks and one pair of jeans that actually fit….the belly band helps sometimes but it is time for new tops and such. It’s time to do some shopping…
 
8.       I am avoiding shopping because I don’t want to look at what size I will have to buy. Ridiculous I know. 
 
9.       Never tell anyone baby names you kind of like. They will label the baby or else really hurt your feelings by saying something stupid. People can act like real idiots around pregnant ladies. Seriously I have a doctor that I pay to tell me what to do and what is safe. I read the books and I just try to use common sense. I do not need to know about your second cousin that was in labor for a whole weekend, or the woman who had a 14 pound baby. Seriously, shut up. 
 
10.   Nothing makes me happier lately than new episodes of my favorite shows showing up on Netflix. It is the highlight of my nights. That is just so sad. 
 
11. This video made me laugh so hard I almost peed. 
 

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